This is what one woman wrote about being a single – she wrote it anonymously. I was just nodding my head as my made my way down the list:
- Not knowing who to write on emergency contact forms.
- Being a third or a fifth wheel.
- Knowing that every time you are asked to a dinner hosted by a couple, there’s a better than 70% chance there will be a set-up involved.
- Being disappointed that there’s no set-up involved at those dinners, against your better judgment.
- Not ever being sure when going to a dinner with a colleague whether it’s a business dinner or whether they have another agenda, whether they are single or married.
- Having insecure women hover when you are talking with their boyfriend or spouse, suspecting the worst.
- Knowing that if you are friends with a woman who is much younger or older than you are but who is clearly unrelated to you biologically, some people will assume you are a couple, not like Thelma and Louise but like Ellen & Portia.
- Feeling awkward about owning more than two cats.
- Feeling awkward about going to a bar or going to a restaurant and sitting at the bar for a drink or dinner by yourself. Especially when traveling for business, when it should be the least awkward.
- Going to girls’ nights out and finding that your stories of dating humiliation are the only ones anyone wants to hear (unless there are any other singles with you).
- Having to listen to your girlfriends bitch about their husbands. A little bit is fine; but a lot is a problem.
- Feeling trapped in the revolving door of new-divorcee friendships. Women who are newly divorced cling to you for life and hope. I am particularly annoyed by the wealthy women who have never had a job and who complain about financial settlements and divorce attorneys. I can’t remember the last time a married woman sought me out for an IRL friendship, but divorced women are like flies and I am the honey. Sadly, many of them expect that I am interested in going to match events and singles bars, and lead a drunk-on-life of debauchery and high heeled late night impulse trips to Paris. They are very wrong.
- Being tough or demanding at work and having people say behind your back, “No wonder she’s not married.” They would never say that about a man.
- Having people say “But you’re so attractive! I can’t believe you’re single” as if there’s got to be something else wrong with you (like a bad credit score, or a horrible disfiguring scar they can’t see through your clothes, or a passion for arson, or too many cats)
- Not having anyone to turn the TV off at night and carry you to bed when you fall asleep on the couch watching a LoveBoat marathon, or to take turns with being the designated driver.
I thought this covered most of the low points. Would you add anything to the list?